My sister told me that she read on the internet that it is rude to put a card with where you are registered for the wedding inside of the wedding invitation is this true? I have never heard that before. How will people know where you are registered at? She said that I should put it in the bridal shower invitation but still how will the people know that are not invited to the shower for example men that I work with or male family members that arent married?
We created a website online for all the wedding information- wedding channel . Com - no spaces of course. On the website we listed all the wedding facts including registration, directions, maps ect. It was free and easy to do. They offer free cards to include in your invites to direct guests to the site (they don't have registration info on the cards). We slipped them in and haven't had a problem.
That said, most of the men you invite will not buy anything off your registry. They will most likely give money if they bring a gift at all. I know some men will be offended that I said that. But they will be the 2% of men everywhere who know anything about weddings.
If people want to know where you registered they will ask.
Word of mouth is the key. If people ask, tell them or like your sis said, in the shower info. Like the previous person said too, most men will give money. An invitation is to ask for company at the wedding, not for gifts.
You're sister is right, it is rude to let people know if an invitation where you are registered. It is by word of mouth that this information gets around. Typically by the MOB of the MOH.
Most men are getting to be wedding savvy -- probably because most women are too busy to walk them through the process. The men invited to your wedding will figure out the bridal registry way and get you either something you need or money.
Definitely don't put registry cards in your invitation. Like in other topics on this site say, it is rude to mention anything about gifts in the invitiation. If people want to know where you are registered they will ask. Just let your parents and your bridesmaids know where you are registered and they will tell guests who ask that information.
It's ok to put wedding information in your invites, as long as they are not printed on the invitation. I have received many invites with registry info included and I've never been offended. In fact, I've always thought it was helpful. I did not include registry info on my invites (as a result of etiquette freaks harping on me not to), and word of mouth didn't work. In fact, I did receive one or two comments from guests that they didn't know where I was registered so they got me cash (which was appreciated, though). Anyhow, unless you have internet savvy guests or friends who know your parents/bridesmaid's telephone numbers (and will actually call them), I'd advise including a little registry card. It may not be perfect etiquette, but you'll avoid getting a lot of duplicates and picture frames.
I wouldn't say it is always wrong, just that it may be considered poor etiquette by certain people (usually other brides on etiquette sites). It was my personal experience that *not* including registry cards in the invitations meant receiving a LOT of duplicates, unwanted platters/vases/bowls, and cash. Also, during the wedding, many guests commented that they didn't know where I was registered.
By contrast, my friend who did include registry cards in her invitations received most of her registry items, had only a few duplicates, and even was told by guests that they were glad she included them so they didn't have to try to figure it all out. She is a kind, generous, thoughtful person and when I rec'd a registry cards I did not assume she was hitting me up for a present. The only thing I assumed is that she was trying to get information to me efficiently. My philosophy, to summarize: i's a personal decision, use your discretion and common sense.
With the use of the internet it takes a matter of minutes to check all major department stores to determine where people are registered. Also, if guests do not know to look online then they can simply ask the Bride or Groom where they are registered.
It's rude to put registery information on or in the invitation. The invite should have nothing in it with mention of gifts, money, registeries, etc.
Not every guest has internet at home access though -- most of my relatives don't. In addition, many people aren't familiar with weddingchannel or theknot. I think every case varies, and not everyone necessarily considers it to be rude to include cards.
You're absolutely right Lily, not everyone feels including registry cards is rude. Those people are uneducated with no social graces. Even if you don't have a computer, or even electricity, you still shouldn't include registry information in an invitation. This sort of information is spread word of mouth.
I need advice. My FI is in the military and as a result, my guests are spread out all over the US (hardly any of my family and friends live near each other, much less us), I'm not having a bridal shower (because people would have to travel too far -- I live in Alaska!), and I'm only having one bridesmaid. Both of my parents are deceased and FI's parents are divorced. How am I supposed to communicate our registry information to our guests? We don't have a tightly knit family, and some folks are even in Europe. Just wondering. Word of mouth is nearly nonexistent with my friends and family -- I'm close with them, but they aren't really close with each other. I was planning on sending out registry cards because 1) that's the only way I can think of to get the word out and 2)we travel around a lot and don't need a lot of excess knick-knacks. We REALLY REALLY need what is on our registry. Help! What are other options for people that don't fall under the traditional bride option? (People who aren't having showers, no large bridal party, no parents, and don't have word of mouth as an option).
I think most etiquette books say you aren't supposed to send registry cards with the invites. But they also say that you aren't supposed to send them with the bridal shower cards, but somehow no one seems to get their panties in a wad about that practice. If anything should be considered a poor display of manners, it is having bridal showers with the sole intent of getting presents! I don't understand why it is ok to extort guests for presents at showers (whether or not there were cards in the shower invites) but not ok to put registry info into the invitation. Registry cards are tacky but bridal showers (in my experience) are much much worse!
Eva, it is up to the host/ess of the bridal shower to determine is he/she is going to include registry information in with the invite. Since the bride never sees the invitations it isn't a reflection on her if registry information is included or not.
It is perfectly acceptable to put registry information in Shower invites. It is acceptable because someone else hosts the shower. And the whole concept of a shower is that you "SHOWER" the couple with gifts to start their lives together. It is not acceptable to include this in a wedding invitation or ever to ask for money gifts for your wishing well.
I for sure think its ok to put them in the invitations....I did and i had many people tell me they loved that so they didnt have to go threw the trouble of finding out where we were registered! Go ahead it helps them out!
I've been getting more and more invitations with a list of registries included in them and I've made a decision: I now REFUSE to buy a gift for anyone who includes one.
When you invite someone to your wedding ceremony, you're inviting them to CELEBRATE with you. Including a list of registries, to me, is like a little kid who thinks that they're "owed" presents on Chrstmas. Wedding guests do not owe you ANYTHING. If someone wants to bring you a gift (and most do) they will ASK where you're registered at.
The place for the registry is on the SHOWER invitations, because that is the entire point of a bridal shower (as long as they're not excessive).
Absolutely not! I make custom invitations and every once in a while a bride will insist. To each his or her own...but as far as what is proper...it's a no no.
I think you are ALL missing the point, regardless of ettiqutte or whatever, it is soely up to the bride and groom to decided it they're guests require the extra informtion. Besides, most peole will bring a gift to the wedding as appose to the shower anyway!!!
In my case, i have family coming from Portugal for my wedding, they don't have internet, and it's a bloody fortune to call them. So what am i supposed to do?
Like i said, regardless of what you all think, I THINK that it is completely up to the Bride and Groom, and puting the registry card in the invitation is NOT implying that you want a gift, it is simply saying that if the guests wish to purchase a gift, then here is where they are registered.
If you get offended by a registry card in a invitation, your being rediculous! Just because a registry card is included doesn't mean your obligated to buy something, that's how i see it!
If your family lives in Portugal (#1) and they don't have access to the internet (#2) then I very highly doubt they will be able to get you anything off your registry in the first place (before arriving in the United States for your wedding.)
P.S. The word is "opposed" and learn the difference between "your" and "you're." Your lack of grammar skills doesn't go very far to prove your point, as it really just goes on to prove how uneducated you are.
