I am not a member of any church, but my fiance and I want to have a church wedding. We have picked out a church that we would like to have our wedding at, but we are so embarrased to just show up and say "Hi, we would like to have our wedding here, but we have never even stepped foot in this church before!" We are runnung out of time, and we need to decide something. What should I do?
You just call or drop by. Ask if they rent our their sanctuary for wedding services. A lot of churches do, some don't. I called nearly every church in my city before I found one that let non-members marry there and had the date open.
Good luck
You can probably book this church for your wedding, there may be a cost involved of $100 or more. Some churches charge as much as $1200 to have your wedding in their building! If you want to have a more non-religious ceremony, you could always get married outdoors or something. No rule that says you have to get marred in a church.
Wow join the club. I was in the EXACT situation. Both my fiance and myself do not attend church and I also wanted the church wedding. I passed a very cut church everyday on the way to work an daydreamed about getting married there. So you just need to make that leap of faith. I called the church and asked them if they performed wedding ceromies on couples that were not church members. The woman I spoke to was very nice. My fiance and I met her and her husband for lunch, they gave us a tour of the church, and she said it would not be a problem. It will never hurt to ask. Just call the church and ask it worked out great for us. The chuch I picked was just as cute on the inside as the out.
Miss Manners,
I love those who try to judge. Just because someone is not a "typical" churchgoer does not mean the don't belive in god, and still desire the moment of walking down an aisle. I think it's sad when not just you but anyone feels the need to make mean and/or judgemental postings.
You would be surprised at all the churches that will marry you if you aren't a member. You might have to go through some classes or at least meet with the Pastor a couple of times but it shouldn’t be that big of a deal. Just because you aren’t a member doesn’t mean that Jesus would want it any other way. I used to be terrified to even go to church because I wasn’t a member/regular attender and I thought I wasn’t good enough. I finally realized that if God has forgiven me, why would I care if everyone else was judging me? You SHOULD get married in a church. What a way to start your new life, right in one of God's homes surrounded by His love. You might have to call around to a couple of churches but I am sure you will find something. Try a Free Methodist Church or just a Non-Denominational Christian Church. Never know, maybe you will like it and become a member one day. Congrats and God bless you and your wedding!!
Michelle,
I believed you summed it all up. I think the posting you left was right on and very supportative. I'm very happy with my choice of where I'm going to married, and if anyone has a problem with it, it's just that their problem.
Michelle, I disagree that "everybody" should get married in a church. This to me sounds judgmental in itself. I am not getting married in a church, instead we are doing it outdoors.
People get married in churches they do not belong to all the time. The best thing to do is call the church and see what their "policy" is. Some churches ONLY allow their parishners to be married there but if they do allow you to use the church just for a wedding It will probably cost you more money. Either way first step: Call the church before showing up.
Janine, God should always be capitalized. Also, Miss Manners wasn't being judgemental - she's exactly right. Why get married in front of God when you never go to His house?
Interesting comments....interesting answers to a very challenging question. And it's really a personal decision where to recite your vows. Jesus is always waiting for us to come to him. He picks the most interesting times to reveal himself, and this could most definitely be one of those moments. It's up to the person whether or not they want to accept his invitation. It's all in the big plan. Go ahead and find a church, they should welcome you with open arms. Sadly some churches won't allow you to come in because they want to make sure you are standing up there in the same spirit they are giving their blessings. But when did Jesus ever turn people away. Any opportuntiy to hear his word is an opportunity to have a better life. I think a non-denominational church would be your best bet. They are never judging as in some organized religions.
Have a beautiful wedding.....and God Bless you and yours.
Lindsey, You are entitled to your opinion and trust me I wouldn't want to be married in the church you attend. You do not have to go to church every Sunday to have God as part of your life. You do not have to be in a certain building to pray and have God listen. Just because someone does not confirm to your exact way of worship does not mean they worship any less.
Miss Manners and Lindsey...
The bible tell us to love all, and accept all people. Jesus hung out with all the heathens. He accepted them wherever they were..in or outside of a church. As a Christian, you are commanded to love everyone and offer yourselves to them as a good and faithful servant of God.. Someday you will have to stand before him and try to explain why you turned this woman away! I reiterate what I said before...don't judge...love! If this lovely bride would like to stand before God, who are we to tell her not to. That's the bottom line...it's not rocket science.
Anyway, back to the wedding....it's going to be great..you'll find your perfect place!
God Bless! Happy Wedding!!
I am Christian not because I attend church regularly (although I do) but because of the choices I make in my life. I love my family in Christ dearly and although my fiancé and I attended counseling through our church and can be married there for free we are choosing to have an outdoor wedding. The place you choose should represent you and the atmosphere you are trying to capture because after all most of us started picturing of this day long ago and this will be the most elaborate party ever given in our honor. God will be apart of your wedding day and every other day as long as he has been invited to share in your life. If you want to be married at a church go for it and make it a day you will always remember.
Why do you want a church wedding? If it's because you feel a need for the spiritual presence or an urge to have God in your married life, talk to the pastor, and they'll probably be fine. If you want a pretty backdrop to your wedding, then I would reconsider your choice. The church has a right to be offended at being used as a stage set.
posted 05/31/04 by agnesflack
At PartyPOP you can find the perfect Churche for your wedding.
